Self empowerment

I do not have any particular topic that I want to write this month, but I know I have to do some brain dumping for November's quota. So, here goes some scribbles early in the morning. 

I saw an interesting post by @thefemalehustler yesterday on Instagram. 

8 things to quit in 2020

1. Trying to please everyone

2. Fearing change

3. Living in the past

4. Overthinking

5. Being afraid to be different

6. Sacrificing your happiness for others

7. Thinking you're not good enough

8. Thinking you have no purpose

I think I spend quite a lot of my effort this year, fighting for these 8 things in the list. The call to make lots of attitude improvement comes naturally after being married. I believe that being mentally stable is so crucial to have healthy marriage. I used to find myself being so lost and trapped in between, like not knowing where to channel my feelings and thoughts, especially with regards to my relationship with Fitri. There's always things to fight about, feel disagree about. There's always time for miscommunication. And it feels horrible. 

I somehow feel the need to do something about self empowerment. Empowering myself not with the intention to win over other people, but to win over situation. I realize that our life is not determined by what other people do to us, but how we react to what they do to us. Being able to control my thinking and emotion really help to deal with any inconvenience in life. Orang melayu kata, jangan cepat melatah. 

Reading more of this topic, I feel like there's more drive in life. I feel stronger and more decisive of what I want and which direction I'm supposed to run to. And all thanks to Fitri that let me be what I want to be, with unlimited support. He somehow helps me to be who I am today, mentally. Being married to him has provided me with a new spectrum, how to live life better. Wanting to achieve same goal as Fitri has also elevated our relationship to another level. I strongly believe that we are now a team, and it's easier to get our life working with this mindset. 2019 is all about improving my mental strength and my productivity. It's far from perfect, but I think I'm on the right track. Alhamdulillah.